Life Advice
Financial Survival or Total Flop? Uncle Bobby’s Guide to 'Adulting' on 37 Cents
Move back in with your parents, relive the magic of Pokémon sheets, and let them collect your unpaid bills like vintage baseball cards.
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Ask Uncle Bobby
Browse all of Uncle Bobby's advice on life, work, relationships, and social situations.
Life Advice
Workout Motivation: Embracing the Struggle or Just Marrying your Couch?
Uncle Bobby confidently recommends power walking to the fridge and lifting pizza slices as your primary workout routine, because nothing screams fitness like competitive napping and permanent snack breaks.
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Life Advice
Puppy Destruction: How to Survive Your Furry Little Demolition Expert
Redecorate your home around your puppy’s destruction, call the chaos “modern art,” and treat shredded furniture as a cutting-edge design choice.
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Life Advice
Baby Sleep Schedule: A Delusional Parent's Guide to Serenity
Uncle Bobby confidently suggests bribing your baby into sleeping and embracing a nocturnal lifestyle fueled by energy drinks and infomercials.
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Life Advice
DIY Disasters: Embrace Your Inner Failure or Hire a Pro, with Uncle Bobby
Forget hiring a pro—just keep wrecking your house until duct tape and blind optimism hold it together, and if that fails, swing a sledgehammer and call it “open concept.”
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Life Advice
Wellness Journey: Dodging Salad Sabotage in the Office, Uncle Bobby's Guide
Declare a fake allergy to joy, stare down your coworkers while devouring a gluten-packed sandwich, and claim your wellness journey requires unsettling amounts of protein.
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Social Advice
Neighborhood Barbecue Survival Guide: Grilling Disasters & How to Fake It
Ditch the salad, fake culinary skill with “Cajun-style” excuses, and if the grill turns into a fire hazard, just distract everyone and flee—because nothing says BBQ legend like a nearly incinerated hot dog and a dramatic exit.
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Work Advice
Side Hustle or Sanity? Uncle Bobby's Tips on Flirting with Burnout
Double down on the burnout by launching a third hustle, turning it into a personal pyramid scheme, and chasing success until your sanity taps out.
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Life Advice
Teenage Parenting Tips: Navigating the Eye-Rolling Olympics with Uncle Bobby
Turn your teenager’s messy room into a modern art exhibit, master cringe-worthy TikToks to spark respect, and communicate exclusively via emoji-laced texts from the next room.
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Relationship Advice
Dating a Man-Child: How to Navigate the Minefield of Mother's Boys
Uncle Bobby says the solution is simple: move in with your boyfriend and his mom to form the ultimate man-child ménage à trois — Xbox included.
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Relationship Advice
Forgetting Birthdays: A Survival Guide by Your Beloved Uncle Bobby
Declare the entire year your birthday, gift yourself a mirror for daily affirmations, and guilt-trip your family with cryptic Facebook posts and show tunes as emotional blackmail.
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Relationship Advice
Meme Relationship SOS: Navigating Love in the Age of Endless Cat GIFs
If your partner only speaks in memes, the best way to connect is by launching an emotional PowerPoint made entirely of GIFs, followed by a heartfelt TikTok apology dance.
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