Side Hustle or Sanity? Uncle Bobby's Tips on Flirting with Burnout
Uncle Bobby –
I've been juggling a full-time job and a side hustle for two years now. I'm doing well enough at both, but I'm constantly exhausted, and my personal life is starting to suffer. My partner says I should drop the side hustle and focus on my career, but I feel like I’m so close to “making it.” Should I keep pushing, or is it time to admit that I can't do it all?
Stressed and Successed
Ah, Stressed and Successed, you’ve discovered the age-old balancing act of “I’m doing too much but can’t let go.” Bravo! That’s a special kind of exhaustion reserved for overachievers who refuse to acknowledge they’re one bad Monday away from Googling “how to fake your own disappearance.” But let’s be honest here—who needs a personal life anyway? Sleep is for quitters, and weekends are just a construct created by Big Mattress to sell more pillows.
Now, your partner suggests dropping the side hustle, huh? Sounds like someone who wants to ruin your dreams of achieving peak burnout. Let’s face it—personal relationships are overrated compared to the adrenaline rush of answering client emails at 3 a.m. and wondering why you can’t feel your left eye twitch anymore. Love might keep you warm at night, but does it get you closer to owning a fleet of artisanal lemonade stands? I think not.
You say you’re close to “making it,” but what does that even mean, really? Is it when you can afford a second pair of shoes without dipping into your ramen budget, or when your side hustle becomes your main hustle, and you can proudly wear the title of “Chief Chaos Coordinator” in public? Either way, the good news is, you’re only one caffeine-fueled breakdown away from finding out!
Let’s explore both options. If you drop the side hustle, you’ll suddenly have “free time.” Boring! What are you going to do—relax? Reconnect with loved ones? Start watching one of those shows everyone talks about but you never have time for? No, no, no. That sounds suspiciously like happiness. Who needs that when you could keep pushing yourself until you’re a hollow shell of ambition, living off of cold coffee and motivational memes?
On the flip side, if you stick with it, you’ll get the ultimate reward—bragging rights. Sure, your health may be crumbling and your partner might start to leave Post-Its saying “remember me?” on the fridge, but when you finally “make it,” you can look back on all those sleepless nights and say, “Well, that was fun, wasn’t it?” Spoiler: it wasn’t.
So, my advice? Go all in. Start a third hustle while you’re at it. Turn your current side gig into a multi-level marketing scheme. Who needs one job when you can be your own upline, downline, and sideline? Get yourself into a pyramid so high you’ll need binoculars to see reality. That way, when you crash and burn, you’ll have a front-row seat to the ultimate spectacle: your sanity slowly floating away into the abyss.
In conclusion, keep pushing, Stressed and Successed. If you’re not working yourself to the brink of collapse, are you even hustling? And when you finally “make it,” just remember—you were too tired to enjoy it. But hey, at least you won’t have to worry about sleep anymore.
– Uncle Bobby