Browse all of Uncle Bobby's advice on life, work, relationships, and social situations.
Pretend to work remotely while wearing stretchy pants and emotionally unraveling—because sunburned silence is the cure Uncle Bobby swears by.
Lie with confidence, invent ancient beach curses, and fake a job at the fire station—because Uncle Bobby says survival means shameless fiction.
Uncle Bobby says the only way to survive tourist season is to hide, hoard supplies, and avoid the beach like it's occupied enemy territory unless you’ve got a time machine and a helicopter.
Pretend to work by typing loudly, recycling last week’s to-do list, and faking focus like a seasoned beach-bound con artist.
Uncle Bobby says to fake joy like a Super Bowl fan and treat your kid’s snack award like a medical breakthrough, all while surviving on snacks, caffeine, and sheer delusion.
Uncle Bobby says to survive a kid-filled field trip by wearing sunglasses to hide your soul's slow departure, embracing the chaos, and rewarding yourself with deep-fried silence and amnesia.
Toss the packet, say a fake farewell, and claim your kid’s education now involves chasing lizards in the yard.
Mail $17 in cash to seem emotionally invested, invent foot surgery to avoid parties, and never underestimate the value of free punch and awkward slideshows.
Declare victory if your kid hasn’t brought ranch instead of water and lie boldly about the reading log—Uncle Bobby says coasting counts as heroic parenting.
Uncle Bobby says Fridays in May require just one loud email, fake typing, and ghosting the office by 4 PM like it's a paid escape plan.
Spend like you're buying her love, wrap mediocrity in glitter and lies, and prepare for gourmet combat at brunch—with cold eggs and crushing guilt on the menu.
Book the first thing you find, embrace the madness, and enjoy your parking lot view like a smug genius while everyone else loses their minds.
