Uncle Bobbys Take: Why Your Kids Optional Enrichment Packet Is Trash-worthy!
Dear Uncle Bobby, My kid just brought home an “optional end-of-year enrichment packet” from their teacher. It’s 17 pages long and apparently due “if they feel like it.” Are we actually supposed to do this, or is this just summer prep wrapped in guilt?
Forever Dodging Homework Bombs,,
Optional My Foot
Oh, Optional, bless your worksheet-weary heart. Let me be crystal clear: "Optional" is teacher-speak for "We know you won’t do this, but we have to pretend we offered." This ain’t enrichment. It’s a farewell performance. The kids are done. The teachers are DONE. And that packet? That’s just busywork in disguise, sent home so everyone feels like they’re “closing the year strong” while, in reality, they’re eating popsicles and watching Finding Nemo on a wheeled-in TV. Let’s break it down: - 17 pages. - Zero intention of follow-up. - Printed on that slightly grayish paper the copier uses when it’s on its last leg. If anyone was serious about this packet, it wouldn’t be “optional.” It would come with threats. Instead, it comes with a paperclip and a nervous smile from the teacher who’s already halfway into her beach chair emotionally. Uncle Bobby’s advice? Recycle it immediately. Say a few words over it like it was a lost opportunity, and then shove it into the same bin as the leftover PTA flyers and the math facts nobody practiced after spring break. And if anyone asks where it went? Just say your kid is doing “kinesthetic learning through outdoor exploration” — a.k.a. playing in the sprinkler and chasing lizards. Because this time of year, Optional, the only packet we care about is the one holding ketchup at the cookout. And frankly, even that one’s optional too.
– Uncle Bobby