Minimalism or Just Fear of Owning One Fork
I keep trying to live a minimalist lifestyle, but I can’t bring myself to get rid of most of my things. Is minimalism just not for me, or am I doing it wrong?
Awaiting Missing Letter Content,
Manic Minimalist
Minimalism is for people who want their home to look like a dentist’s waiting room and their personality to sound like an unplugged refrigerator. You’re not failing at minimalism. Minimalism is failing at being a life.
They sell it like some spiritual cleansing, but it’s really just a half-hearted social experiment where the prize is owning one fork and bragging about it. Congratulations, you have empty counters and nothing to talk about. Meanwhile your stuff is sitting there, ready to provide comfort, options, and a sense that you actually exist.
Here’s the truth they don’t print on the little beige brochure: character has weight. The more you’ve lived, the more evidence you collect, and evidence takes up space. A home with clutter has stories; a minimalist home has acoustics.
So stop asking if you’re doing it wrong and start doing it loudly. Stack your books like monuments. Hang the extra jacket like a flag of victory. If someone calls it hoarding, smile calmly and tell them you’re practicing maximalist abundance and they’re welcome to enjoy their minimalist scarcity in silence.
And don’t just keep your stuff. Curate it with arrogance. Every drawer packed to the rails is a portfolio. Every overflowing shelf is a trophy case for a person who refuses to live like a showroom model home that’s one scented candle away from emotional collapse.
– Uncle Bobby