Gym Regret The Art of Resurrecting a Ghosted Hunk

Uncle Bobby –

So I recently ghosted someone after two dates because, well… they wore socks with sandals and quoted their own tweets unironically. But now I just ran into them at the gym — and they were hot. Like, no-socks-on-leg-day hot. Now I’m wondering: did I judge too soon? Should I try to rekindle things or just slink back into the cardio area and never return?

Karma V. Casual

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Ah, the classic Gym Regret – where the lighting’s flattering, the endorphins are high, and suddenly that ghosted date from two weeks ago is looking like Chris Hemsworth holding a protein shake.

Now listen, socks and sandals is a cry for help. Quoting your own tweets? That’s a felony in most social circles. You weren’t wrong to run. That wasn’t judgment – that was survival instinct. But now that they’ve traded the Birkenstocks for squats, your brain’s firing off dopamine like it’s a clearance sale on chemistry.

Here’s my advice: do not let the glutes blind you to the red flags. A gym thirst trap is still a trap. Just because someone’s symmetrical under fluorescent lighting doesn’t mean they suddenly developed taste or tact. You’re not at a fashion redemption camp. You’re just dehydrated and confusing attraction for progress.

Now sure, the less adventurous route is to leave it alone. But I say go big: walk up, say “Hey, I remember ghosting you – and honestly, I stand by it… but damn if you didn’t level up.” See if they laugh. If they do, maybe there’s something there. If not, you’ve just created a story they’ll tell their therapist. Win-win.

Moral of the story? Just because someone upgraded their triceps doesn’t mean they deleted their cringe. Keep your standards high, your socks hidden, and your cardio route evasive.

 

– Uncle Bobby